What's in a name?

[admin]

Some people have been asking where the name "Through the Flame" came from.

The origin is a line from a U2 song called "Bad" about addiction. It is from their Joshua Tree album, in case you are trying to find it. Whether or not you like U2, the song speaks a lot about the situation.

Bad

If you twist and turn away
If you tear yourself in two again
If I could, yes I would
If I could, I would
Let it go
Surrender
Dislocate

If I could throw this
Lifeless lifeline to the wind
Leave this heart of clay
See you walk, walk away
Into the night
And through the rain
Into the half-light
And through the flame

If I could through myself
Set your spirit free
I'd lead your heart away
See you break, break away
Into the light
And to the day

To let it go
And so to fade away
To let it go
And so fade away

I'm wide awake
I'm wide awake
Wide awake
I'm not sleeping
Oh, no, no, no

If you should ask then maybe they'd
Tell you what I would say
True colors fly in blue and black
Bruised silken sky and burning flag
Colors crash, collide in blood shot eyes

If I could, you know I would
If I could, I would
Let it go...

This desparation
Dislocation
Separation
Condemnation
Revelation
In temptation
Isolation
Desolation
Let it go

And so fade away
To let it go
And so fade away
To let it go
And so to fade away

I'm wide awake
I'm wide awake
Wide awake
I'm not sleeping
Oh, no, no, no

[Dominus]

I dont know much about yourself, whats your story then?

[admin]

Dominus, I have gone through this struggle myself and felt disappointed at the lack of good resources available. About 7 years ago when I was dealing with this problem head on, I found a forum at http://www.no-porn.com/ which was very helpful to me, but in recent years it has become so commercialized that I thought it would be nice to make a place where people could come that was ad free and a little more personal. We don't sell hypnosis products or e-books, the motivation here is just to help people. Some other resources have a religious position which may turn some off and we would like to help as many people as possible. I hope you guys are liking the site so far!

Eventually, we would like to expand to help with alcohol and drug addictions, but keeping them completely different forums.

[Dominus]

I for one really appreciate it, it has been a big help for me so far and reading the experiences of others only serves to strengthen my resolve. So I think a big thanks is in order!

[HalfPint]

Wow, thats really cool. I never liked U2 but I love the lyrics to that song. I'm also excited to hear that you guys are planning on possibly expanding to drug and alcohol abuse forums. I had a good friend die in a car crash due to drugs being involved *sadly enough my friend was the one using the drugs*. I've also had friends become dropouts and lowlifes due to drugs. Also with alcohol I've seen it abused so many times that I would love to see those two forums come to be part of this website. Great ideas. Thank you for the explanation of the name.

[Sunfoot]

Dominus, I have gone through this struggle myself and felt disappointed at the lack of good resources available.

I'd like to add, "good resources that feel comfortable." Since participation here is voluntary and anonymous there just seems to be a good vibe.

... it would be nice to make a place where people could come that was ad free and a little more personal. We don't sell hypnosis products or e-books, the motivation here is just to help people.

I appreciate the core values that are espoused at this site. Again, these values add to the sense of mutual support and the sharing of experience, strength, and hope.

Some other resources have a religious position which may turn some off and we would like to help as many people as possible.

I am personally seeking recovery from porn addiction through developing a greater spiritual foundation. As I've stated elsewhere on this site, as a member of NA, I'm learning that - for me, IMHO - spirituality has less to do with organized religion than it does with establishing, developing, and maintaining a personal relationship with a Higher Power.

I choose to call my HP, God, because it is nomenclature I'm familiar with. But God doesn't necessarily have to mean anything more than Good Orderly Direction. That said, I definitely want G O D in my life. The neat thing about TTF is that I feel free to comment on my own belief structure and, at the same time, free to explore the spirituality of other recovering PA's.

I hope you guys are liking the site so far!

This site serves, in large part, as the inspiration for me to feel courageous enough to make changes in my life. Here at TTF I am greeted with support and understanding; I also feel part of something good that is happening - not because of me, nor in spite of me. There it is: I feel a part of instead of apart from.

Namasté,
Sunfoot
:)

[CaveInimicum]

WOW!

Admin, I would like to express my huge gratitude >:D< thank you for building such a helpful community in the first place!

7 years is not a short time...
Would you mind to share, I have a question that I've been looking for an answer:

"How long does it take to completely get rid of an addiction?"

I am aware that it is different for every case, and that maybe there is no such thing as "eternally complete recovery", but....

In case of porn addiction, I believe that this affect us deeply in ways of our thinking and behaviors (as fellow members here have pointed, e.g. urges, objectifying people, etc).

Would you mind to share, how long did it take for you to finally feel at ease (no or very minimum urges, no more objectifying etc),
to feel that the way your body and mind thinks and behaves has changed?

Also, in your case what is the interval of "waves of impulse" coming?
(I mean when one starts to withdraw from an addiction, urges might come as often as every hour, but after 7 years or so, do they still come often? Or do they vanish completely?)

Once again thank you very much,
I wish all the best of life for you and your family.
:)

[tjk2008]

Just a small thing, and sorry to be pedantic, but I don't think the song "Bad" can be found on the album, "The Joshua Tree" (at least, it's not on my copy of the album!). But you can definitely find it on U2's 'Best of 1980's' album.

[Vorlan]

Just a small thing, and sorry to be pedantic, but I don't think the song "Bad" can be found on the album, "The Joshua Tree" (at least, it's not on my copy of the album!). But you can definitely find it on U2's 'Best of 1980's' album.

There's a live edition of it on the Reissue Delux 3CD edition of The Joshua Tree. Maybe that's the one Admin meant. :)

Best wishes,

Ben

[nomore]

Just a small thing, and sorry to be pedantic, but I don't think the song "Bad" can be found on the album, "The Joshua Tree" (at least, it's not on my copy of the album!). But you can definitely find it on U2's 'Best of 1980's' album.

The original version is on "The Unforgettable Fire" album, which I downloaded recently. I hadn't heard it for years but I thinks it's aged really well, it's probably my favourite record by them.

Also the song "Bad" will now have a new meaning for me.