A prayer

[Crisodian]

I sent this to someone yesterday and realized I had never gotten around to posting it.

I can't take credit for writing it, but it helps on the bad days and while I am not an overly religious person, you can certainly customize this to speak to your Diety:

Dear God:

I really need Your help today. Sometimes it seems like the world around me is filled with fear, loss, pain, anger, and confusion. And when I look inside me, I see more fear, loss, pain, anger, and confusion.

I know You’ve saved me from so much in the past, and I know You’re still the most important thing in my life. But I’m having a hard time holding onto You now, and believing that You can ever keep me safe and heal this broken place. So I’m asking for Your help today.

It’s never really been easy being me, and it’s a lot harder now. I’ve been working on living the way You want me to, and learning to treat people including myself with love and respect.

But now big parts of my life have been washed away, and it almost feels like part of my soul has been washed away too. Sometimes I don’t even understand the way I feel, or the way the people around me are acting. I’m exhausted. My nerves are raw. How can I use Your love and Your principles to get through all this and come out stronger and better?

I know from past experience that You often heal me by helping me find and use the strengths you’ve already given me strengths that I sometimes forget to use. Then, little by little, things get better. I get better. So today I’m going to ask You to show me these and other strengths inside me, and to help me remember them and use them all day:

• Trusting You: When I trust You trust You no matter what my fear gets smaller, and I get calmer. I know You’re taking care of me, and You’ll keep taking care of me in ways I don’t yet understand. I start to see things more clearly, and I make better choices.
• Accepting Your Will: When I try to accept Your will even though I’m hurting and I don’t know what you want for me then the fear starts to disappear. I can feel safe, even if there’s danger around me. I can face whatever happens and do whatever You want me to do, whether You want me to stay or go, speak or be silent, take a stand or simply watch things happen. I just need to keep trying to do what you want.
• Healing the Wounds: I know I’ve been hurt by this experience, even though sometimes I just feel numb. I also know there are old wounds deep inside me that make it harder to handle what’s going on now. I’m willing to let You heal all these wounds, no matter what I have to do. Sometimes the best way to heal is just to feel whatever I feel, even if I don’t like it. Sometimes I have to ask for help and let people help me. Sometimes I can heal by speaking my truth, sometimes by letting go of guilt or resentment, and almost always by trying to do things the way You want me to, even though it’s still hard.
• Choosing to Love: I ask You to help me choose to love myself and others, with all our flaws and mistakes. I don’t have to fix other people or take away their pain. I just have to love them and be a respectful witness to their pain, so they’re not going through it alone. Love isn’t an emotion; it’s a decision. Whenever I’m making that decision, it’s easier to heal, and harder to cause problems for myself or anyone else.
• Understanding: Please help me keep an open mind, be honest with myself, and see everyone including myself with compassion. Help me remember that the painful and sometimes irrational things we’re thinking and feeling right now are normal reactions to a very painful situation the kind of situation that human beings just aren’t built to understand. Help me take the time to understand people before I react to them.
• Vigilance: Please help me be vigilant, so that I can tell whether a person, situation, or action is likely to help me heal or cause more problems.
• Discipline: Please give me the discipline to make choices that will help me heal and avoid choices that will cause more problems.
• Grace: If I do start to make unwise choices, please help me catch my balance and set things right before my words or actions can lead to any problems.
• Responsibility: Please give me the courage to take responsibility for my mistakes and their consequences, and to make amends for any harm I’ve done, whenever I can do this without causing more harm. Please also help me take responsibility for being part of my own healing for asking for the help I need, and accepting it.
• Forgiveness: Please teach me to forgive myself and others for the harm we’ve done, no matter how large or small our mistakes, and no matter how old or new the wounds are. Help me understand that forgiveness doesn’t give me or anyone else permission to keep on doing harm; it just means I don’t have to carry the past around any more.
• Community: Please help me reach out to others, to help them and accept the help that they have to offer. I know my healing will be deeper and more complete if I do it in community with others. We may feel like we’re broken, but together we’re whole. And in the love I give to others, I’ll find the love I need from You.

I thank You for giving me these strengths, and for helping me find them and use them today. With your help I will survive this, and I will grow much stronger and closer to You.

Amen.

Find peace,
~C~

[LADYM325]

AMEN! If this doesn't say it all, nothing will.

[Misty-Eyed Matthew]

Amen to that! Great post, Cris.