Journals Great Help

[Amethyst]

Ok, this is my first go at this. I have done a lot of other types of journaling before, but not like this, on this topic, and on the web. I am looking forward to it, though - like having a companion to help with my journey to live honestly with my wife. No one else knows i am doing this (recovery plan), so having a sense of having a companion and others to be with and connect with and comiserate with and be accountalbe to, really helps.

I feel like this PA recovery will help with my whole life, not just with looking at P.

[IN NEED OF HELP]

Amethyst

First I just want to welcome you to TTF
I am glad that you started your journal. by you writing your thoughts and struggles in it, it will allow us to get to know you better. we will be able to see what you are going through in your addiction, and hopefully, we can give you the Encouragement, and Support that you need.

This can prove to be a long journey to get thru this addiction. this is not an addiction, that you can just say, I am done with porn, and see it gone. T o get rid of this problem, we need to have a recovery plan in set. We need to make all the changes that need to be made in our life, if we are to beat this monster. Once you have a recovery plan in place for you, YOU NEED TO WORK IT, you can not get relaxed in it, because, just as soon as you do get relaxed, this monster will pounce on you so fast. so please alway be on guard against him.

We will help you the best that we can my friend. We will encourage you and support you, But you are the one that needs to work real hard in this, to beat it

I wish you the best of luck one you journey. If it is in our hearts to overcome this addiction, then you will be able to come out a winner

[Amethyst]

thanks for the response - i feel like this site could really help me get things in perspective and regain honesty in my marriage -

[IN NEED OF HELP]

All we can do, is do the best that we can in this battle. as long as we have a good game plan set up, and we stick to our plans, we will be ok. the one thing about this recovery is, that if we are to beat it, it has to be in our hearts to do so. we are in a tough spot with this addiction, but it is nice to know that we are not alone in this fight

[Amethyst]

i have a question about how to use the recovery journals - it has been suggested that we write in them often, perhaps every day, but how do folks usually do that? do you just add to the thread you've started?

[CurseTheBeast]

Welcome to TTH first of all. You have taken the first step, but like learning to ride a bike, at first you were very wobbly and fell a few times. But you got back up and worked it again until you conquered it.

I had asked the same question earlier this morning on the General Forum. And of course there is no "right" way. However, I think posting everyday can and will have a very therapeutic effect. Also after a week of making a new post each day, at least in the Journal forum, the ongoing post is best as it allows others to easily follow you in your quest rather than trying to piece together a lot of individual postings.

Good luck and the people here will help you and finally remember to Curse The Beast!

[Jon Doe 109]

Welcome! I'm a newbie here too so may not have much good rooted advice for you but I've been trying to write a little each day in the journal and to read others journals each day. It's been very helpful along with the 100 day challenge in my recovery so far. I've only got just under 2 weeks but for a first attempt at quitting I'm feeling very encouraged by the TTF community and the support I've found here. Approaching it like a 10 -20 minute daily job has been good so far for me. Just checking in each day, reading, writing and reconnecting with a commitment to quit PA. Even after this short time being free from the habit has improved various areas of my life!
Good luck on your recovery journey.
Best,
Jon

[Remi]

Hey Amethyst, glad to see you've started your journal. Again, welcome to TTF. Listen to what INOH has to say, he is a very experienced and valuable member to this site.

Use this journal whatever way works best for you. Let us know how you're doing in your recovery. We want to know if your doing well, it will provide inspiration for others. And if you're struggling, others will give you the help you need. If you have any questions, ask. The members here have a wealth of knowledge and experience between them. Chances are, someone here has been through what you're going through and can provide an answer. I found that being completely honest in my journal was very helpful for me. It allows me to get a lot off my mind and allows others to offer their support and encouragement when I need it most.

Good luck on your journey Amethyst. We're all here with you.

[Amethyst]

thanks guys for the feeback - INOH said something to some other guy that really resonated with me, how it felt so good to have his wife use his laptop and his not having any concerns about it because he had been P free - that's how i felt after last weekend when i looked at P when my wife was out of town - she comes home and i pray to God she doesn't ask me if i have looked at P (she knows i have a problem) - i really hate that feeling, of hoping so much she won't ask me, gives me a pit in my stomach - in two weeks she will be out of town again for the weekend and that will be my first big test - i have planned that i will not even channel surf the tv because i only want P trigger stuff there, and unless i have a real specific reason to use my laptop and won't use it at night, and find some kind of specific activity to do at night (after my son goes to sleep) because that is when i am vulnerable - i plan to clean some part of the house, or watch a funny movie - of course, i will want to choose a movie that has some skin in it, so i should avoid that, or if i do i have to be certain that i will tell my wife the name of the movie - she has often said it is more the lying than the actual P that hurts her - although the latter certainly is painful for her and she just can't understand why i would look at it when i know it hurts her -

[rouby]

Amethyst,

I am glad you found TTF. I have been fighting this addiction for over 13 years with very little success until I came here. The support and encouragement I have recieved here was life changing.

I feel like this PA recovery will help with my whole life, not just with looking at P.

I am a little different from many here as I do not think we have to be saddled with this malady our whole lives unless we keep making bad choices.

What you wrote above is to me, real recovery. In fact, I think you will find that quitting P is just a necessary step and not the solution.

THe most important thing to do is just create some distance from P- whatever it takes. Have a plan to work through the first 3 months. If you slip- do not beat yourself up and make sure you learn from them.

Good luck on this, the hardest of all journeys.