Day 2

[Tony1983]

Relapsed again. I don't know what to say. I don't know why it hapened. The cravings were just too strong. I held out the first day but they didn't subside. I just couldn't take it. I am so embarrassed. What a horrible feeling. Once l was able to go a whole week, l can't understand why I can't do it again. This morning I was feeling so hopefull, and now l'm back in the usual misery. Tomorrow is day one again l guess. I can't believe l turned out to be so week. Wish me luck.

[Daniel]

Tony,

I can hear the agony in your situation. For us on the outside of the details of your journey it would be guess work to come up with some advice that would be the most helpful...

One thing I will venture is you may not have a plan.

In case you do not, check out the plan posted on the front end of the site here.

Planning is everything early in the recovery process. If you resort only to tactical reactions to triggers and temptations when you are (perhaps) already reeling from the last binge, you don't stand a chance.

Get tough on your environment. Make failure hard to do.

You're here and you're posting, hang tough, you'll get through this.

Daniel

[RootedinGod]

Hi Tony,

Addictions are tough, take it from me 6 years free from Alcohol and drugs, It was tough for awhile and now Its not to bad.

I remember my sponsor telling long ago, go in for the long haul as it's not easy. pack your tool box and go to war.
For if it was easy everyone would be doing it.

I learned to become stronger with my relapses and pretty soon
it did get easier. Now it does not hardly ever cross my mind.
I am hoping someday to reach PA like that too.>:D< my brother

[Phil413]

Relapsed again. I don't know what to say. I don't know why it hapened. The cravings were just too strong. I held out the first day but they didn't subside. I just couldn't take it. I am so embarrassed. What a horrible feeling. Once l was able to go a whole week, l can't understand why I can't do it again. This morning I was feeling so hopefull, and now l'm back in the usual misery. Tomorrow is day one again l guess. I can't believe l turned out to be so week. Wish me luck.

I'm sorry to hear about what happened, but don't be too hard on yourself, Tony. We've all been there. This is hard, especially at first. So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, start again. Now, where do you go from here?

Like Daniel said, you've got to have a plan. And just so you know, "I hope I don't do it again" is not a plan. ;)

So tell me, what's your plan?

Phil

[Tony1983]

I am 27 years old, I work during the week and I have weekends off, I volunteer on sundays and take afternoon classes one night a week, I have always been the solitary type. I am most at risk when I'm at home as long as I'm outside and doing something l'm ok. However it's 25 under outside not too many places to go, and even if it wasn't I don't have too many friends and my family lives really far away so l am on my own, I can't just disconect my computer cuz l use skype to videocall my family. I am thinking of getting some Prozac I read online it helps, and perhaps try and spend more time outside like the library. However after a hard days work all you wana do is just relax at home. My addiction is to Mb and P follows, Mb is a chemical addiction maybe a chemical solution is necessary. What do you guys think. Sorry for the long post.

[Daniel]

Tony,

I strongly urge you to not try to combat urges by turning to medication.

This will put you at risk of becoming addicted or at a minimum dependent on the drug; also referred to as "replacement addiction".

If you did go the "chemical" route, you would still have to get off of that eventually and deal with the original problem(s) that were shoved aside by the drug.

Better to utilize short-term aids (filters, changing daily habits, becoming accountable, set home page to TTF, read the SOs journals, read all around (Knowledge is Power), consider telling someone IRL which will be a huge help); then working actively on changing your thinking which will be the ultimate long-term solution. Drug free!

Nothing really worth having is easy to get. You can do this. And we're here to help you.

Daniel