The truth is painful - but required

[clog]

Well done FM - I'm very happy for you. And good idea to reward yourself. That looks like a mean machine. There's no catching up with you now... in more than one sense of the word!

Clog.

[Dominus]

60" TV's, harley davisons... .This is ultimately not fair, all I got was a couple of roses chocolates......,;)

Seriously though, you are doing great, and you have been such an encouragement to others, this site needs success stories. Keep up the good work.

[FoolishMind]

In true Oscar award style.....

Ladies & Gentlemen. I have been P & MB free for Seventy Four days.

I honestly did not think this was possible. But Every single day I fight, battle and win against P. This has only happened because at the beginning of this year in 2008, I was caught! Caught for the last time by my wife. My wife would have left me if, it was not for Throughtheflame, Dominus, Light and 012Hallows.

I got that extra last chance! I did not realise how precious that was. I have gone from strength to strength, It has opened my eyes so much reading all posts from all the member here, on a daily basis actually hearing the destruction that P causes.

I have read many fantastic, encouraging and inspiring posts, that has really motivated me, helped me when weak, and given me tips to stay strong. In return I have tried to offer my advice where I feel appropriate, and this inturn has motivated me to remain P & MB free.

My relationship with my wife, is one that I have not experienced for the last 5 years of marriage. My wife noticed a change in me within the first few weeks, Now I am noticing a change in my wife, she is so much more confident, so much more free, and so much more attractive to me (which she always was) just I was blind!

I feel stronger as a person, stronger in mind, and not as lethargic and moody as I used to be.

I like the new me, and I like my new wife!

Anyone starting their journey now, You just wait, the result are fantastic.

When you read the posts of Half Pint and Dominus speak of the daily successes with such enthusiasm, it is so contagious, and far more addictive than P.

(BIG SIGH) Seventy five days ago, I was miserable, moody, and a very selfish man. Today, I am a proud, husband, and a happy man. I hope we all as a group will continue to progress and feel this way.

I was looking at the read stats on this thread, and was shocked. Thank you all who take the time to read my journal, and while ultimatley the journal section is primarily for my benefit to help me express myself, I sincerly hope everyone can take little snippets or relate to something that can ultimatley help you.

FM:)

P.S. My Moped drives like a dream! (what can I buy next month?)

[Dominus]

You could buy a calculator, there have only been 63 days so far in 2008! ;)

[FoolishMind]

Thanks Dominus, Clearing getting ahead of myself, Now im depressed.

So maths - Last saw P on 31st Dec 2007. Caught and went P free from 1st Jan 2008

So today is day 63! Where the hell did the extra 11 days come from I dont know!

Apologies.

Please let me know if I get it wrong again. Going to go and sulk now!

[Dominus]

Your doing awesome, a real success story, its been hard for me some days, but reading yours and Inshi's posts has encouraged me to stay the course many a day. Keep fighting the fine fight my friend.

[HalfPint]

Thanks Dominus, Clearing getting ahead of myself, Now im depressed.

So maths - Last saw P on 31st Dec 2007. Caught and went P free from 1st Jan 2008

So today is day 63! Where the hell did the extra 11 days come from I dont know!

Apologies.

Please let me know if I get it wrong again. Going to go and sulk now!

66 days today foolish ;) In just 8 more days you'll be back to that 74 which is totally awesome. I commend you on the good work. Keep it up buddy. You and I are really close in our success. Were almost like running buddies :D. If my math is correct then I'm going on 69 days today (if someone wants to do the math for me, I'd appreciate it, but I think 69 days is correct). I decided to be porn free December 27th and then December 28 was my first day porn and masturbation free (for anyone who doubts my ninja math skills).

[FoolishMind]

Hi Guys, feeling really crappy last few days, I think it is mainly to do with politics at work at the moment, and just generally not being as vain as usual, feeling quite ugly, fat and unhealthy.

I keep telling myself im Human, and P or no P in my life, im still going to get bad days, i think its hitting me a little more right now, because I really have been on a high for the last few months, but I am probably comming down a little, and when your low, the stupid thoughts of the past keep comming back. Sort of like the whispering in your ear, saying " Go on, make yourself feel better".

As these thoughts were playing in my head, i knew had to jump out of bed and change my focus, so literally just jumped straight into the shower, to chill out a bit.

Feeling fresh now, but still blugh, going into work later today, do just idling some time away on here. Thought it was safer to just be on this site then anywhere else. So apologies for the waffle, as this post has no real point, just regurgitating the thoughts in my head is all!

Hope you all have a good day.
FM

[Light]

Hey FM, I saw your "mood" on another post so I decided to check in on your journal to see how you are doing. Funny, that mood thing is pretty cool.

Anyways. Sorry to hear you've been bummed lately. I think we all go through natural cycles of up and down in life. It's pretty natural. The key is to not get feeling sorry for yourself to the point where you do something you will regret...

I've been feeling a little under the weather this week as well, I have been doing a lot of overtime at work and haven't had much time to relax. Then when I get home I spend almost all of my free time with my girlfriend, leaving me no space...

I would suggest exercise, it can really work wonders to boost your mood. If you're feeling weak, turn off the computer and don't turn it back on till you feel better!

I made a resolve a while back, and that was to not go on the computer/internet without a purpose. Before I even turned it on, I told myself where I was going, and made sure to turn it off when I was done. I think that's been a huge help for me to stay focused and not get distracted. I also try not to "surf" random sites as that has always lead to trouble in the past.

Well, good luck buddy, I will be thinking of you! Hang in there, a brighter day is around the corner :)

[HalfPint]

Hey FM. I can kind of relate to your feeling of "blah". Today just sucks for me. My ear infection feels worse today, the antibiotics the doc has me on, has me almost throwing up because its hurting my stomach so much, its already 5:50 pm and all I've had today is 2 packages of oatmeal maybe a cup (measuring cup) of Gatorade and water. I haven't been thinking about porn or anything like that but today just really sucks. lol on top of that, yesterday I head-banged to a cool song on my computer and today my neck hurts (head-banged a little too hard haha).

Anyways, hang in there buddy. Were running buddies remember? Don't give up, don't look back.