Going on a trip

[Hilroy]

So I've been actively working on my PA recovery since Feb 16, and have so far managed to avoid any slip-ups. I've also been out of town with my girlfriend the whole time, having returned home yesterday, and for me, the main danger is in boredom and idle time spent at the computer. I zone out, run out of "normal" sites in my routine, and end up looking at P. I understand that my toughest fight will be when I'm back in my normal routine, and in changing that routine to keep me out of trouble.

I may or may not be going on an optional work trip next week for 7 days. I would like to go because it is the culmination of a year's worth of hard work, but I am not sure if it will be best for my PA recovery. I do not fear relapsing on the trip. I will be able to call my girlfriend and talk about the day every night, and I should have time to write in my own journal daily. Also, I will just plain not have a chance to have access to a computer by myself to look at P. Also, I've never been one to get antsy to look at P while on a trip. It hits me when I'm at home doing nothing and staring at the walls.

My concern, and that of my girlfriend, is that this week long break will just be delaying my establishment of new habits and routines. It's another week where I'm not at home getting settled into my new vigilant lifestyle. On the flip side, it's also another week where I will not have much of a chance of relapsing, which puts me that much closer to breaking down the chemical side of this in my mind. I'm really not sure what to do here, and I have to make a decision by tomorrow. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

[artguy34]

It seems that you are on a path to a new and better life...

My suggestion would be to go on this trip if it truly is a reward for a years worth of hard work at the office. Plus with a supportive g/f and little chance of relapse while away, it seems you have a lot going for you.

Do not fear changing your routine when you come back. Consider that your reward for fighting this addiction. Make the changes as you see necessary, talk to your g/f for support and you will see that relapse can be overcome with determination. You need to confront your addiction when you get back to the daily routine. So you may as well face it and swing first. Accept your new vigilant lifestyle and use that as a deterrent for fighting your urges!

This is one of my favorite quotes:

"The Game is scheduled...
You have to play it...
You may as well win!"

Good Luck in your quest to fight this addiction!

AG