Arg what to do??

[hast]

If I get off the computer, I will surely MB. If I don't, I could look at P. Maybe I'll just go to sleep. Even still, though...I might MB or go to P after laying in bed for a while...it seems that's when my mind's really vulnerable to such things. :-s

[Crisodian]

Sorry to hear you are struggling. Have you been able to identify what your triggers are yet? What makes you feel like you need to view P or turn to MB? Maybe focusing on that will help you get past the urges? Just a thought.

You can do this.

Best wishes,
~C~

[BobinVT]

Hi Hast:
One of the things I read in the articles here is about having a game plan of alternative activities when the triggers come up. Being able to recognizing the triggers seems the most imprtant aspect of recovering- at least to this newbie- but it may take awhile to actually recognize them. In the meantime, maybe just having the game plan of healthy alternate activities whenever the urge hits can be your focus. Sleep helps your body recover, allows the mind to regroup. Tough to do 24/7 though....I'm making a walk a regular part of my day, and try to go when I know I'm most likely to want to start surfing. Just putting off the urge for 5 minutes to do something else has been helpful for me. When I quit smoking I became a cleaning freak...it gave me something to do whenever the urge to light up hit me, and the end result (having a clean apartment, office, desk, whatever) made me feel better.

Hang in there...

[hast]

I ended up giving in U_U
I feel waaay better today, though. I dunno, I was just having a bad self-control day, yesterday. I ate like 300 m&ms, as well! >.<It wasn't pretty...

I'm having a good day today, though. I feel really determined and I feel like it's very possible to stop this. I've only been here a couple days, and I wasn't really ready to stop again when I joined...I'm ready now. I can do this, I will do this, and this time next year, I'll be celebrating my one year sober anniversary!

I'm finding more activites to take up my time (I'm more vunerable if I'm bored), and I'm turning the wifi off, locking the computer, and turning the computer off after 12:30am from now on. No more internet that late.

Thanks for the support, I'll come back here and read those often as reminders. Actually, I may just print them out so I'm not on the compy when I'm struggling. Is that okay with you guys?

[Crisodian]

Thanks for the support, I'll come back here and read those often as reminders. Actually, I may just print them out so I'm not on the compy when I'm struggling. Is that okay with you guys?

Hast,
You do whatever you need to do to keep yourself in the right frame of mind and on the right path. I'm glad you are finding support here.

Having a plan of what to do when the urges strike is a great start as well. Good for you!

~C~

[hast]

Sorry to hear you are struggling. Have you been able to identify what your triggers are yet? What makes you feel like you need to view P or turn to MB? Maybe focusing on that will help you get past the urges? Just a thought.

You can do this.

Best wishes,
~C~

My triggers:
Definitely PMS, I've just realized. I think you actually responded to that post. I haven't relapsed once when I wasn't PMSing....I think it's a combination of the higher libido and the crazy emotions. Other than that, just shows and stuff that have a little too much sexuality in them can do it. Or racy ads on the internet.

[tru2myself]

I'm finding more activites to take up my time (I'm more vunerable if I'm bored), and I'm turning the wifi off, locking the computer, and turning the computer off after 12:30am from now on. No more internet that late.

I know you can do it!!! We all can! But it does take patience and tons of self discipline. I totally agree with your strategy of turning the computer off after 12:30am. I'd even go a step further and suggest going to bed before 1am.

Setting a curfew has really given me a control over the "right before bed" urges. Be very careful not to stay up too late and surf the web. There were many times in the past when I've fallen into this trap. I'd be surfing the net without the intention of viewing porn, but come past like 12:30, I slowly find myself wanting to view it more and eventually I give in. Therefore, I now try to head to bed all together instead of surfing the web (even if I'm not feeling tempted initially) early in the AM because that could definitely lead to a relapse.