First Steps

do23 · 09:47 AM

Hello, i believe the main problem for me atm basically hormones.

For teh past eyar i have browsed porn, regularly and had a couple of girlfriends. however over the year i found that i have ended up watching porn almost daily and a variety of it. i have never lsot a girlfriend due to it directly but my attention seems less on her and more on it. well enough is enough. it has affected concentration on revising and things too and with a desire to have a career as an army officer, i do not want any obstacles. i today threw away a magazine ive had for 2 years. and wiped my computer clean of anything explicit. i have setup a firewall and am debating wether to have my dad type in the password for blocking. i also have recently undertaking an openness to religion and spirituality. i am currently getting on well with a girl who will keep me on track becasue i dont want to lose her too

. thanks for listening. any advice on any of this would be gladly appreciated.

do23 · 01-10-2008, 09:41 PM

main deterent so far seems to be keeping to my military training stuff. going for a jog even in rain feels far more rewarding. however can someone plz tell me tht the self-judgement will go away :S its horrible but feeling good cos havent thought twice yet.

FoolishMind · 01-11-2008, 09:58 AM

Hi do23,

Well done in cleaning everything up, and distracting yourself from weak areas. Excercise if definatley the best. In answer to your question re: self judgement. I dont think there is a simple answer to that.

But if you didnt judge yourself for yoru actions initially, you wouldnt actually think your doing anything wrong. I am still in the early stages and trying desperatly to save my marriage. Yes P can destroy everything you have!

One big thing i have learned from this forum, is that everyone here is extremely genuine, and genuinley kind hearted people. It is the P that changes our moods and actions. Kind of a Jekyl and Hyde syndrome. When you read through the Partnes forum, you read wives and g/friends saying that their partner is the best ever if it wasnt for the PA.

If you havent already read 'Lights' thread for new starters, please make sure you do, as it has some great simple steps, which are great weapons in seeing of any temptations.

Be stong, and if you do feel weak, spend some time on this site. and the temptation will go.

do23 · 01-11-2008, 10:11 AM

read your journal and i also was at extent of searching for slightly-attractive celebs etc. this is my second day clean. plan to keep it like that. im also looking into writing a more planned week for myself. so i dont find ymself in bored situations. im lucky to have friends who do not realy endure that area, but some are casuallers. week of excersise, orienteering and biking me thinks. i must admit i am relieved a bit to how similar everyones cases are but maybes on different levels. i will definitley be keeping a journal of this habit change, if-not, Life-change!

all the best,