Did you know what your triggers were?

[burnedout]

I have the same triggers as everyone else here. One thing I'm learning about them is that they probably produce a more intense reaction in me they do in most people. I am piecing this together a little at a time.

When I read one report about addiction, it said addicts have lower levels of the pleasure-producing brain chemical dopamine in their systems than non-addicts. I said, "No, that's not me. My pleasure response is off the charts when I see a pretty woman." Then I read something else that reiterated that addicts do indeed have low dopamine levels. However, those levels spike tremendously in response to a pleasure-producing stimulus, as the body regards that stimulus an opportunity to make up quickly for its usual dopamine deficit.

This would seem to explain why I have always had a hard time taking pleasure in the normal things everyone else does, and why I sometimes engage in risky, thrill-seeking behavior. I am learning to appreciate those normal things more, and giving myself more time if I don't feel the pleasure response right away. But I have also read that those with dopamine deficits can push themselves to try harder than others at more productive things than drinking, smoking, or watching P in order to get the sense of satisfaction we all need to keep us involved in life. I got that sense yesterday when I finished working on a paper for school, and it was a far different, healthier, and more honorable feeling than I ever got watching P.

Unfortunately, the dopamine deficit, if that's really what it is, always returns, and I still don't know what to do about that. "Move on to the next thing" would seem to be the correct answer, but it feels so hard to do sometimes when my natural baseline is so low. Knowing that it's naturally so low seems to help a little, though. Hopefully, if we here know why triggers are so much more powerful for us than they are for others, maybe we'll all respond better and do less damage.