How many relapes does it take to stop

[Life-lies-trust]

My next question is how many relapses does it take after the addict decides that they need help till they STOP relapsing and lying? I keep being told that the relapses happen without thinking about that he is doing. It just an automatic response. I ask why is it automatic?

[debv]

DW hasn't relapsed. Well, maybe really early on, when he was purposely looking at old ads that included those soft-P style lingerie and perfume ads. But he hasn't gone back to real P, not that I'm aware of. He's been clean for 10 months.

[Crisodian]

LLT,
It's a choice. A conscious one at that. Relapse is not something that is automatic. There is no magic number.

Peace,
~C~

[mell]

For me, relapses happen when I stop working on my recovery, point blank. I have relapsed several times, usually after months of sobriety. I get complacent and the old habits (not necessarily P to start) settle back in. My recovery slips to the back of my mind andeventually i go back to the P.

Crisodian is right. It is a conscious choice, in my case to think I have beaten it and relax my defenses.

Remember, this is an addiction. It will never go away. It can be overcome only with life changes.

[PER50NA]

I guess it vary's from person to person for me I couldn't take it anymore the cycle of starting recovery only to relapse a few days later was actually starting to drive me crazy and i was tired of it so i guess it really depends on if your ready to stop and if you are strong enough to stick to it thats what i think anyway

[FoolishMind]

Hey LLT, in short it is not the count of relapses that dictates when a PA will stop relapsing.

Have a read of this and understand why people relapse. Like most things in life, if you want to succeed in something for the first time, plan, plan and plan some more.

Why do you relapse?

FM

[Life-lies-trust]

Well plan plan and plan only works with the addict decides to use the plans and not act out. Why decide to act out and not follow the plan? Because it is conformable to relapse and it is hard to not. Is what I have been told.

FM your post is really good it is just that I live with an addict that has lied for so long I'm trying to figure out if he can ever tell the truth or if the relationship is doomed because he can not change.

Everyone Thank you for your post. I think this has been and will continue to be a good topic here.