To: PAs with SOs giving the 2nd chance to change

[StarPuppy]

I was out for a dinner with my friend and his girl earlier on, He had his tonsils (operated/removed?) and was unable to eat any hard and hot food for the time being and could only eat ice-cream and was getting sick of it.

So during dinner, she kept on giving options on what he could eat and it was really annoying him and he told her to shut up a few times but she continued on despite the harsh reply from him.

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Now the point of all this is simply..How much do you take your SO care and concern for granted?

Sure, she may be a nag at time BUT wasn't her "nag" a form of concern that you fell in love with?

I thought of my FS(Future Spouse) in the same situation as this and i was reminded when i was younger and before i met my FS, i was always alone and hoping that there was someone for me, to care for me. And now that i have her, i take her care and concern for granted at times despite me being a PA, she supports me with being a ocasional PA as long as i do not commit PA after marriage(because all boys view P), she still loves me.

I still do feel a sense of shame and regret that i have hurt her feelings at times and took her care/concern for granted but she chose to stick with me, a guy who is a PA.

Now my question to all PA who relapse occasionaly with SO support / PA who is strong in the fight against P with SO support, Do you still remember how you fell in love with your SO and what made you fell in love with her?

Sure, she may be a nag at times and do not meet your needs(Emotional/Intellucal/Physical/Sxual), but who was it that stuck with you during the tough times and helped to raise the kids up and take care of all the household needs?

It was the woman who you said to "from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part."

I would just like to remind all the married PA , not to forget the sacrifices your SO has given and at the same time, remind the SOs that your SO PA is fighting hard and needs you during this dark battle

Thankso:-)

[Sonomette]

Forgive me for posting here-- Im a SO, not a PA-- but I couldn't resist.

This is slightly off topic, but as a military wife for many years, I have grown very accustomed to doing what's necessary on the home front so that he could concentrate on his mission.

I KNOW that he takes a lot of what I do for granted, as you say. But I didn't do it because I was a martyr, and wanted to say "oh poor me" at the end of the day. He doesn't know about half the stuff I do to make this house run -- from helping with the kids homework to deworming the dogs to cleaning to paying all the bills on time and a million other things-- because if he were to worry about that stuff, he wouldn't be focusing on what he needed to do.

If he were to be deployed and constantly worrying about how I was managing back home, his lack of attention could get not only himself but also other people killed. I do not want that on my conscience.

I didn't really know what he did in the army, but it wasn't my concern because it wasn't my job. He didn't know what I did at home, because that wasn't his job. We both stay in our own lane, so to speak, don't meddle in issues that we know nothing about as far as the other goes, and it works out beautifully.

Some people might call it being taken for granted. I call it autonomy to be as productive as we can be in making our lives run the way they need to.