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[Recovering]

Hi, I am new here. My boyfriend and I have been together on and off over a year. This is the first time he has made an effort to get help. It took me cutting him off completely (and losing a few friends) for him to see how much his actions had hurt me. Today, I have a feeling something was wrong (I gewt this feeling everey time and it's almost always right) when he texted me to say his temporary sponsor (who he has had about a day) made him mad by telling him to call after a test he has today. He said the guy told him he's afraid (my bf) will "act out" no matter what the consequence and to keep in touch with him. My botfriend claims this came out of nowhere but I know that can'tbe true. He must have had thoughts about it for this guy to think he was going to act out, but I can't say that to him or he'll get mad. I called him to see if he's OK and he got mad andtold me to leave him alone. It's not like him and I don't know how to react? Is he being defensive because I was right? Should I stay away for awhile till he calms down? Should I even stay at all? I can't handle going through this again

[champagnesuppanova]

Hi Recovering. I'm sorry that you find yourself dealing with all these experiences that are making you so unhappy. This addiction is often very deep-seated within the PA and it can be a tough battle just to get the PA to acknowledge that they have a problem. Getting them to accept help can be even more difficult. I can't tell you what is going through your BF mind, but I can tell you that you need to work out what YOU need and to act on that. The way in which this addiction affects the partner of a PA can be very traumatising so you need to ensure that your emotional health does not suffer as a consequence of anything your BF does and that you keep yourself strong and healthy both mentally and physically.

If you read through this site you will find lots of useful information and articles about being the SO of a PA. It isn't easy, but the information should give you some help in deciding what it is you want to do for yourself. Good luck and please do let us know how you get on. CSN

[Recovering]

Thank you!