The Count

[stillandagain]

I would love to enter into a conversation about the "100 Days Count" or topic of "sobriety" calculation.

How do other SO's view this? watch the count? a conversation starter? give affirmation and celebration?

How about the PA's? Do you want your SO to watch the count? How can we support you?

[WifeOfNewLifeMan]

stillandagain,

I never paid attention to the count really. My husband didn't join any challenges and I was glad. If he joined a challenge, say, 100 days, or clean for the next month, I would have been discouraged. Why is there a time period? What happens when the challenge is over? This is a lifetime committment, not a month by month or day by day thing. If he committed to a month or a certain time period, that would have spelled doom in my book. For me, there is only "before" and "after".

This is just for me, however, and I know the challenges and sobriety counts really help some people.

[JenMac]

HI SA!
I agree with WONLM. There is only before and after. However, whatever others find that works for them, I am all for.
Mac just recently joined the 100 day challenge after I encouraged him to do so. I felt it was important (as Chas had pointed out) that others could see that there were others here who were in long term recovery. There had been a large group of people who seemed to all come at the same time and it is hard to take everything in when you first arrive here. So having recovering PAs on here that have had success is a way to let others know that it can be done.
I believe that you should use the tools that work best for you but in the end I really do believe in the Relapse is not an Option policy.
Jenn

[rosie]

I don't care about the count. I care about how he is being in every day life. If he 'relapsed' (hate that word) then I would be mighty pissed but that is his choice...he knows how it hurts and he knows it ruins us, and i cant control it.

The count to me focuses on a TINY part of recovery...and as much as it is great that they are acheiving 'sobriety', it is not an indicator of real recovery so I think its a bit of a false marker and I dont take it all that seriously.

[Beanhead]

To answer my wife's question, I think what I want is for you to see that I'm being open with others in my "recovery".

I know that one of my own issues is hiding behind a mask, not putting myself out there to be held accountable.

However, by placing myself on the list and being accountable and open, I know that others can see my name and where it is on the list. This helps me stayed focused and strong.

Also, there is a very real feeling of reward as I see my name moving up the list. It feels great and I want to feel great!

bnana_dance