Which behaviour is down to PA? Which is not?

[hannah]

Hello everyone,
I'm new here. FOr the past few months my boyfriend has exhibited some selfish and disrespectful behaviour. I just don't know how much of it is down to the mysogynistic images he looked at and what is him?
The worst times are when he's been left alone and feels down about some very stressful things we've had to face this year , moving three times, two divorces (both married when we met) - serious work battles, relocation etc.....
He doesn't have a drink problem but he become very nonchalant and morose when he's had a couple of glasses of wine alone, I know now, he was also looking at P. There is NO REASONING with him.

However today, no drink, no P and he was vile because I wanted him to relax while I cleaned the kitchen. He is SO NEGATIVE about people and things. No one else sees this side, my parents think he's wonderful. I know it is a huge thing to admit the P and he has to put effort into constructive things, I know this will take time. I don't feel he's coming on here or doing the reading that deep down, he knows is necessary.


I am drained today.
x

[Hopeful59]

Maybe his nasty attitude is due to porn withdrawal? Porn can act like a drug. From what I hear, once men quit they go through withdrawals much like a drug addict would - and that can make them irritable, depressed and downright miserable to be around.

Will he talk about how he's feeling with you and discuss whatever is bothering him (assuming he knows)?

[rosie]

I totally agree with Hopeful.

My HB is like that after he has used P/etc, due to shame and hiding it, and he is like it when he WANTS to look at P, and I believe he withdraws and tries to push me away as a way of justifying the using P. "She isnt being close to me, so what choice do I have?"

Eitherway, it is not acceptable and maybe a good discussion about it is in order.