Can't do it alone ...

[Dida]

After a long night of failure, and finally deciding to make up my mind to change, here I am. I have been struggling with mb and p for about 13 years, and I have been really trying to stop for about 2 years now. I was in a previous relationship where it was accepted, but after finding the love of my life, it almost came crashing down when my transgressions were discovered.

From that point, I promised to get better, and tried everything from browser blockers with passwords to specifically redirecting some sites to pictures of Jesus. It all worked for a while, but I always seemed to crack and come crashing down hard. I promised myself I would eradicate it by the time I got married, but being recently married, I failed at that also.

I am here to finally break free and be a better source of love for my wife and for God. She does not know of my continued struggles, but I intend to defeat these sins before they consume my marriage.

I'm glad I finally decided to post here, and I love the idea of coming to this website whenever there is temptation.

Thank you guys in advance!

[2frustrated]

Welcome. I can't wait to hear your story and keep up to date with how you're winning over this thing! You've got a whole army on your side now!

[waterlily327]

Welcome to TTF! It sounds like you did the right thing, coming here! I am an SO here, and if your SO is aware of your PA and is affected by it, I can say that being here has been a life-saver for me and my relationship. When couples are affected, it seems that many who are here together do well on the path of recovery (I can attest to that, as my new fiancé, Rockinastorm, and I joined in March). I have some tips for starting here, just from what I have seen work for others. It sounds like you have already tried some, but it never hurts to re-focus!

Tips
--Get rid of any and all p*** you have, internet files, pictures, videos…everything!
--Get an internet filter (K-9 is free and works pretty well)
--Start a recovery journal here to track your progress
--Decide what a full recovery means to you (for some people that is no p***, for others that means no p*** and m*sturbation)
--Read recovery journals
--Read the significant other’s (SO’s) journals
--Educate yourself, by reading about the negative side of the p*** industry in the articles posted here on TTF (they are safe!!!!)
--Figure out how your life will be better without this addiction hanging over your head…for some people, having that goal will help when the going gets tough
--Determine what your triggers are, and learn how to avoid them

I have found TTF to be a wonderful, supportive community. I hope you find the same support and healing that so many have found here. Good luck on your journey to recovery!