Glad I caught myself early...

[rlogan]

Hey everyone,

Well, first post on the forums...still feel a bit odd but here I am and I'm going to stick through this to the end.

I first noticed that there was something wrong when I started having issues being intimate in real life situations. I thought to myself, its just stress/side effect of medication/lack of sleep/diet, etc. Things will get better if i just fix these problems.

After a while I realized that those things weren't the issue. Why was it that I never had sexual problems when using P, but only when I was in real life situations? Something struck me there- if anything it should be the other way around...

I always justified myself by saying that I was just a sexual person by nature, and that P was a natural outlet... geez was that a lie that kept me going for a long time.

Luckily, I found support within a close friend of mine and these forums early. I consider myself to be lucky for catching my addiction before it started completely controlling my life. I can't say I am at the point where I consiously need P, but subconsiously I do need it, and I prefer it to real life intimacy and interactions. It's not something I am proud of, and I am glad that I have you all here on the forums to keep me company and give me support through my recovery.

This is Day 1. I feel like it is controllable for now, but I know that there are much stormier waters ahead. I have installed filtering software on my computer, and given the password to my close friend who has graciously agreed to help me through this. I have gotten rid of all hard and soft forms of P, and have redoubled my efforts on my hobbies and schoolwork in an attempt to distract myself and keep myself out of trouble.

Wish me luck, and hello to everyone else out there!

[mell]

Rlogan,

Welcome to TTF!

You are off to a great start - letting someone close to you know about your problem is huge. I'm a firm believer that we can only get through this with support from others. It's good to see people here that recognize the problem at the early stages before it takes complete control over their lives.

Best wishes.

[Wasted Years]

I did the same thing. Yesterday I installed cybersitter and deleted my horded P. Welcome again and keep on. We are both off on a great start.