A turning point

[Edge]

I'm Eric, a recovering PA from New Jersey, USA, and I need to share a significant positive development in my recovery journey. I've struggled with p*rn addiction since early adolescence, and this monkey on my back has brought me to depths I don't care to visit again.

Earlier this week, I encountered a pornographic image, and for the first time in memory, my immediate internal response was 'Wow, that's disgusting', rather than 'Wow, that's exciting/hot/etc.'. My disgust was followed quickly by sadness, for the person on display and for the anguish p*rn's brought into so many lives.

Now, after 30+ years of daily experience with the addiction, I realize this doesn't mean I'm 'cured', and I'm uncertain whether disgust and sadness will be my initial responses the next time I'm exposed to p*rn. Nevertheless, this represents a welcome departure from my typical, reflexive, positive reaction to p*rn.

Have a great weekend.

Eric

[JenMac]

Hi Eric!
I must tell you that I am somewhat happy to read this post. I have often wondered, and my H and I have talked about this exact thing. Does there come a time when because of education and reprogramming that your mindset changes and these things can then turn to disgust rather than excitement? Seems to me this may be possible with some people in some instances but as you said, it doesn't mean that it will happen each time. Your reaction could be different due to many varying factors. I also realize that P can be stimulating even while it disgusts you. So for an addict it is a scary, slippery slope and best to be avoided whenever possible.
Thank you for sharing this experience Eric! I am glad to hear that you have had this response. It gives me hope actually!
All the best!
Jenn