[Pja]

Dear All,

Greetings--I'm PJ, and this is the first time on the board, and I have to say that I'm very encouraged by the candor and council that is expressed in the various posts (of which I've only looked at a few).

I decided to start this thread to discuss the specifics about how / why a Christian could be addicted to porn. Some background on me first--I am a Christian (saved for 7 years), but I was first exposed to pornography when I was 8 or 9 years old, and I've been pursuing pornography since I was 15 (I'm now 30, still unmarried).

When I was about 25 or so, I decided that porn was something that was not good to have around (due to the fact that it dishonored God), so I got rid of what I had (a movie or two and a magazine, I believe). All was "well" up until about 9 months ago when out of the blue, I was tempted and pursued the pornography via the internet.

Now, as to the topic of this thread: here is what gets me--I know deep down that the pursuit, viewing, and MB to pornography does not honor God at all and, I believe, causes Him to be disappointed, yet I -still- do it (in fact my latest slip was this evening). I'm sure there is a great deal of wisdom on the board that would provide some answers, but it absolutely kills me that I willfully choose to engage in behavior that is sinful and puts a rift between me and God. I mean, I know a few things:

1. There is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus (Rom 8:1)
2. Upon asking for forgiveness, our sins are as far as the east is from the west and He remembers them no more (Ps 103:12 & 1 Jn 1:9)
3. We're all human beings and can easily be tempted to allow our passions to overcome our reason


What's the point of all of this? I do not want to continue pursuing pornography / lustful thoughts, and I know that for me, the only deliverance that I will have is through Christ.

I would appreciate any words of wisdom / knowledge from those that feel led to provide any. I also covet your prayers, and I will join in prayer with you if you desire as well.

Many thanks,
PJ