56 year old married fellow

[little_wife]

I to am in my 40s fighting PA. I appreciate all of the comments and suggestion. Thank each of you for your courage.

Welcome roachcoach! Me and my husband are in our 40s also. This is a scary age with lots going on. Our ages was probably one of the great motivators for me to ask for a change in our lives. I wanted him to decide if he were going to continue worshiping youth/beauty, or allow himself to mature as a human being, and chose love and appreciation of less superficial values. For me as a middleaged wife, i knew i couldn't continue to compete with P's ideas of what makes a lover desirable.

[roachcoach85]

little_wife,

thank you so much for the reply. The things you said to your husband was so true. I now understand that when we were younger we enjoyed our youth, ran, played, and all the other things that came with it. Now that I am older and much wiser and I can still enjoy those things just not let them interfer with the life I lead now. I now truly appreciate my wife in ways she does not even realize. I find joy and excitement in little things such as a certain vegetable cooked with dinner or a little smile when I buy her a particuarly sweet piece of chocolate. I also enjoy her beauty now more than I ever had because I now realize that her beauty is not just on the outside, but the inside where it truly counts. thank you so much

[little_wife]

what a lovely post, roachcoach! I don't know if your wife is on this website or not also, but I hope she reads it. >:D<'s to you both.

[Jon Doe 109]

I'm 40+ and have a 25 year + addiction... day 2 'clean' so far.. these posts are very inspiring. I'm glad to hear people who are no longer kids share a common struggle. Indeed....time to grow up! I hope I can.

[Timothy]

Timothy Here, Thank you all for sharing here. I am age 55 next month I'll turn 56.
My story begins as a youngster being sxualy molested by neighbors who were male teens
while i was only about 4 years old. Though I don't have clear recollection being that
young in age and somewhat blocking the incidents out, I know it happened to me. Next I remember
being School age , touched inappropriately , by older Teens mostly young men and one girl.
Like I was a science experiment to them. on and on More and more of these types of scenarios mostly
males being the perps. they introduced me to a future addiction compulsive M. One so called friend actually took total advantage and robbed me of my virginity.Introducing me to my other two addictions Sx and P. At times the feeelings were such I was a willing participant but other times I knew it was wrong and If I said no he'd beat me and force himself on me or hurting me
till I gave him ***** or *****. It hurt really bad. I started acting out as feminine. causing lots of trouble at school having to deal with
being teased, physically abused, enduring gay slurs. My Father was verbally and physically abusive also.
Had a cousin molested me off and on from 8 yrs into teens. I stopped acting out as a single adult when I joined the church. i found i really liked girls not guys. Got married but still had my addictions. Now they were in hiding until stress set in. My marriage changed as i did Anger issues came out. Couldnt have children lots of stress. lots of lies. sI started using P and m too much, wanted sx from my wife more than she was willing. never forced her though. but resented when she said No. so went looking for Love. found Adult places and crusing spots to act out. I was out of control. became a father by adoption . kept on playing in secret. It was awful.
M being the main source of my relaese from all the turmoil in m,y life. Finally in 2009 found 12 step program for PA and other addictions. My life was about to change for the better. No more acting out Same Sx thoughts or relations. The fem side was toned way down ALMOST non existent . once in awhile Ill see that side come out. . NOW I feel the healing power of recovery and the Saviours atonement in my life. I am Thankful for finding TTF also. God Bless. I tried not to have any triggers and be sensitive to others with this post. I appologize if anyone is offended. I do not wish to offend only to share my real story. My true hope lies in my recovery from my addictive destructive lifestyle and In Turning over my will to the will and care of my Saviour, Jesus Christ, My Saviour . Take care, TIM