[bodget1974]

well had a good weekend with the wifes family... we went there had a barbi on sunday which was good, i'm still finding it hard to approach my wife and just explain things, i think the thing is i really don't know where to start..i think sorry just doesn't begin to cover it..so i end up not saying anything, i don't know how to approach the subject, also i wait for the right moment but it never seems to come... we have a 3 year old who is great but can be hard work, which in some cases is good because it gives us a break from the subject of P..anyway think this journel is more going to be a place for me to say the things i want to say to her... as in i'm so sorry for sinking to the lowest depths again, and that i promise not to fall down there again, i'm determined this time...

i've said all that before, and failed, and yes i'm scared i'll fall again... but i'm determined to beat this addiction i've got, this horrible demon in me, which destroys my relationship..

i will prevale.